Music Production, DJ, Live PA and Random Ramblings
Archive for January, 2009
Patriotism
Jan 18th
Along with the rest of the world, I watched the “We are One” concert last night and my immediate impression was one generally shared by most non-Americans….”Dam these yanks lay it on thick”, “listen to all this feel-good BS”, “America thinks they are important enough to have a world wide concert with every star (mostly black) on the face of the earth promoting democracy, hope and the power of the United States” and on and on and on….
Eventually what I began to think was whether or not I really hated their viewpoints, got irritated with their patriotism, felt dis empowered by their desire to rule the world or…..was I just jealous that I had never felt such feelings of patriotism for my own country.
In truth, I have never known what patriotism feels like, I have never felt a desire to protect and defend my country and its honour and why should I, I live in South Africa.
I have heard my best friend, who grew up in Israel talk about how he would fight for his country, maybe even die for his country. This seems so foreign to me, I argue the point and how stupid patriotism is when in fact, I will I had it.
What a weird feeling to love your country, I am sure the majority of the world would respond to this, What a weird feeling to have no love for your country.
Neither here nor there
Jan 11th
I really really wish I could be where we anticipate we will be within the next 2 years, but the waiting, the planning, the sense of limbo is a serious pain in the ass. Part of me wonders whether my greatest skill, procrastination, has anything to do with the delays, no doubt it does.
So what can one do when part of a purpose has a relatively long duration to maturity? Patience is a virtue isn’t it? Hmmm, perhaps I am without that virtue. In honesty, I have always fallen into the trap of planning for the next before finishing the current. Now that might seem a reasonable way of going through life, if not admirable, but every now and again, I have to ask myself, does that way of thinking come at the cost of not enjoying the moment? not throwing oneself completely and honestly into what one is doing at the time?
I mean if you are always plotting for the future and forgetting that the best plans are the ones you never made (which in my case is absolutely true) then surely hindsight would suggest to fuck the plans and LIVE LIVE LIVE!!
I am both trying and getting better (despite the obvious paradox of trying to be spontaneous). In the last few years I have definitely started to acknowledge that the best things in life are truly free and on top of that I am slowly beginning to enjoy each and every moment and see every step in the work flow, every part of the process, as a journey and not a destination.
As the sugar packed says, life is a journey, not a destination…I try to remember that every day.
2009
Jan 4th
Well another year has come and gone and I have to admit, until quite recently, I thought my year had been more successful than it actually was – not from a financial or career perspective but rather from an emotional and sprititual perspective.
In fact, in an earlier post I actually praised myself for my enhanced emotional development that I believe I had spawned over the course of the year, only to realise towards the latter part of the year, that much of my self-prescribed improvements were in fact, merely syntactic sugar and band aid around some far greater characters flaws and deficiencies.
In my short period away from work, I endeavoured to correct some things, re script some paradigms and create an environment which fosters change…My idea was that instead of trying to tackle the problem itself (which I haven’t figured out yet) I would rather change my environmental frustrations as well as take greater charge of the things I have some control over. In other words, I am focusing on my Circle of Influence instead of my Circle of Concern.
Already I have seen vast improvements in my view towards the things which I felt were upsetting me….I was predicating that I did not have a fundamental problem with the specific thing itself but rather the sugar which surrounds much of life….by improving my acceptance of the sugar and also adding sugar to taste I actually feel better and even excited to tackle those things which I believed, only 2 weeks ago, were eating my soul.
Time will be the truest critic of whether or not I have actually made a lasting improvement but I believe I am on the right path again and I am really and honestly looking forward to 2009.
